Settling into our new home

One month reflection of moving to Austin, Texas

I recently hit my one-month anniversary living in Austin, Texas.

In that time period, we have:

• Set up our new home (a home we own!), which is making me feel very ~adult~ (shout out to my parents for helping us move in, which definitely helped us get up and running quickly)

• Hosted a housewarming that doubled as my husband’s birthday party

• Hosted a friend for 2 nights in our guest bedroom

• Learned to drive again (still not going on those freeways though…)

• Building some new routines (like going to the gym, meal prepping, etc.)

• Trying out new groups (like running groups) and checking out local spots (we took a trip to downtown Austin last weekend!)

• Reconnecting with old friends and family (my brother lives here), and making new ones.

A glimpse into our new home

A lot of folks have been asking me how it’s going, so here’s my attempt at articulating what the past month has been like.

So… how do I feel?

Overall, pretty happy about the move.

When I decided to leave New York, I felt ready for a slower, more intentional pace of life. As much as I loved the independence and energy of New York City, it really got to me over time. The city is so loud and busy, always making you feel like nothing I do is enough, that there’s always something better to do around the corner. It’s like I constantly had this restless, anxious energy that I didn’t know what to do with, so I spent time soothing myself by distracting myself (hello, DoorDash and Doomscrolling!)

In Austin, I wanted to take a different approach. I wanted to wake up slowly and take my time. I wanted to be okay with not getting everything done. I wanted to enjoy the little things in life. I wanted to prioritize family, relationships, and health over getting ahead on work. The decision certainly comes with tradeoffs. Austin isn’t the best city to build a big entertainment or tech career—if we wanted that, we should have stayed in New York. Austin also doesn’t have as much cultural stuff as New York does, nor is it very accessible (MTA, you are sorely missed).

But I’m okay with the tradeoffs, because for the first time in my life, my routine feels enough. And while I’m still building my community, having that pressure removed has already made me feel so much better.

Mount Bonnell: Check

How am I building community?

I moved to Austin knowing some people, but it helps that my husband used to live here and still has friends here. I’m so used to being independent, but I now find myself spending more time with my husband’s friends than I did in New York. In some ways, it’s nice—I don’t have to have so many “who are you and what do you do” conversations. But there’s still distance; after all, my husband hasn’t really spent time with these people in years, and a lot of life has happened during that time.

My biggest lesson from moving to a new city during the pandemic is that community takes time, and the only thing you can control is putting yourself out there. That’s why I’m prioritizing showing up even if it feels uncomfortable, and giving myself the space to explore rather than feeling like I have to commit to something just because I showed up. So far, I haven’t made a great new friend, but I know that it’s just a matter of time. I just have to give it a minute, and then things will happen.

What am I scared of?

My biggest fear is that I fall back into bad patterns once the novelty of being in a new place wears off.

The fear is good. It forces me to pause and reflect if the decision I’m making truly ladder up to the choices I want to be making.

But until that point, I’m trying to ride the wave of newness, and also appreciate that this move—something I’ve been dreaming up for the past few years—has finally come together. And isn’t that pretty cool?

Thanks for reading!

I’m a former tech product manager turned technical writer/filmmaker. In this newsletter, I share more about my journey of chasing my writing/directing dreams while working part-time in tech, growing a family, and trying not to let achievement define my self-worth. Here are some ways to support my work:

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